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Not Much Happens And Everything Happens

October 21, 2012 by Chris

marshI know… it’s been over a month since the last post. It’s been weighing on my mind but as we travel down the Intracoastal, the days are basically the same. We travel during the day, usually about five to six miles an hour and average about fifty to sixty miles in a day. That’s as much as most people travel in forty-five minutes to an hour in their cars. Not much happens and everything happens. Most of the trip is through marsh lands and back country areas of North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia and then finally, hopefully, Florida. Not much happens. Then again… everything happens. Life happens. I’ve wanted this to be about more than sailing. I’ve said  it so many times that I myself am sick of writing it so I know you’re sick of hearing it. That said, when we anchor out, take Jet ashore and then travel fifty-miles to another anchorage and repeat the whole drill, it doesn’t make for exciting or stimulating reading. I’ve been contemplating and agonizing over how to inject witty repartee into this experience of… the world at 5 MPH. Funny thing… In the midst of all of this, Life happens.

We knew to expect the unexpected when we left Rock Hall. We knew the elements would play a major role in this journey. We quickly discovered that getting Jet to shore every night was not as easy as we thought. Who knew that for about two-hundred miles along the water-way, there would be no Terra-firma to speak of. Just endless mounds of swamp grass and deep, thick, black, smelly mud. We knew we could encounter engine failures, part failures, bad fuel, and countless other “unknowns” along the way. BUT… we were prepared. Mentally, physically and emotionally… we were up for the challenge. Financially? Not so much… our cruising kitty was on life-support when we left Rock Hall but we had to get to Lauderdale to start Phase 2 of PHASE II. We had a plan. We had a “budget” of sorts and had the utmost faith in ‘V’s’ ability to get us there. We didn’t however, expect Life to hit so hard.

This past Monday… October 15, we had engine trouble. We had just two weeks before replaced the fuel pump and thought we were done with that subject. Not so. We left St. Augustine on a clear, crisp and hopeful morning bound for Daytona but the engine, after running fine all week, quit. Like we ran out of fuel. Right in the middle of the channel. Just as it had when the fuel pump went. Melody poked her head out and said, “What’s going on?” I said, “I’m not sure” and ran to drop an anchor. We did the checks and looked over everything we could think of. I started to think maybe bad fuel. After about 1/2 an hour we decided to contact a marina we passed about a half-mile back. We decided to try to fire up the engine and get back to Marineland Marina and do a more thorough search. The engine miraculously fired up. I held my breath and put it in gear. Off she went. Drove us right to the slip. As we were tying up, the engine stalled and Melody’s phone rang.

Some of you may know, docking can be stressful.  A big, heavy boat moving without brakes. Wind, currents, tides… it can be hairy so my friend Tommy and I, along with Eric from the marina got “V” situated. As I walked back to the cockpit, I could hear Melody sobbing deeply and I knew…

See,  a week or so prior her mom suffered a heart-attack back in Little Rock. She’s been battling Lupus for a long time and her body had become frail and weak from that horrible disease. She was a delicate woman with a mesmerizing soul. I never once heard her complain even though she lived in constant and severe pain. As we were moving south, Melody’s sister Michelle was holding vigil at the hospital and giving us regular updates on her condition, which had been stable. She told us that mom was sedated as the doctors were trying to slow her ever increasing heart rate. She would let us know when and if we needed to get on a plane and go to her.

Well… Monday… our engine failed us just as Kathryn’s was failing her. My girl… the love of my life was sitting in our v-berth sobbing and heaving as she got the news from her father and there was nothing I could do. This little “adventure” of ours became one of the most insignificant moments of my life. I was helpless. Cut-off. Isolated and grasping for straws. It’s all well and good to be “off-the-grid” until someone desperately needs your help and you can’t get there. As it turns out, my friend Tommy’s son Luke lives in Daytona. We booked Melody on a 6:00 flight and he graciously drove to get her and then drove her back to Daytona so she could make the flight.

Kathryn Lynn Beadle. Kathy. Melody’s mom. Michelle’s mom. Matthew’s mom. Michael’s wife. Jim’s former wife and Sydney, Slade and Bella’s grammy passed away Monday afternoon. Kathy loved to fish. She loved her kids and adored her grandchildren. She gave everything of herself to everyone but herself. Her body was ravaged but her spirit was untouched. She was five-feet tall and as tough as nails. Her resolve was unlike any other I’ve ever known. She had a smile and a positive outlook for you every minute you were in her presence.

Now… here I sit. Waiting for parts… Cocoa Village Marina. Engine problem. Melody is in Little Rock with the family. She’s tending to all of the “business” that one needs to tend to when someone dies. I am not with her. We have Jet. We couldn’t board him and make all the arrangements needed in the time we had. We have a broken boat. Funds are low and I’ve still got two-hundred miles to go.

This is a story about a journey and I’m trying to wrap my head around the big picture. The irony is that this summer we went to Philadelphia to be with my family. My dad’s Parkinson’s was doing damage. My mom suddenly had heart troubles. We decided that we’d spend Christmas with Kathy and now I’m dying inside about that decision. I looked at my phone today and saw a text from Kathryn that she sent me on my birthday this past summer.

“I’m good. I’m feeling happy that you spent your birthday with Melody on the boat. I hope you are sleeping through this heat. I love you Chris and I pray that you had the best day ever. xoxo”  Well Kathy… I miss you. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you this week. And I pray that you now have peace. Pain free… Peace.

xoxo

mom photos

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Filed Under: Musings, People

Comments

  1. Werdyab says

    October 21, 2012 at 11:40 pm

    Mel’s Mom knew that you were loving and taking care of her girl, so you were doing everything that she would ever want you to do. I never got to meet her in person, but I loved to hear Melody’s stories about her amazing, good-spirited, and loving mother. I hurt in her suffering, but I feel some relief in her peace. Continued prayers for you and Mel out there in the deep blue and many prayers for all the lives touched by Kathryn Lynn Beadle.

  2. patty says

    October 22, 2012 at 11:26 am

    I am at a loss for words and I am very sorry for your loss. Life always ends and we never know how, we just manage our loss,

  3. Chris says

    October 22, 2012 at 12:09 pm

    Thanks Amanda and Patty. We’ve received tons of love and support and Mel and her family are ok. They are all celebrating Kathy’s life and managing the best they can at this point. We will absolutely continue our journey in the spirit she would have encouraged.

  4. Jeff Porter says

    October 22, 2012 at 10:08 pm

    I’m following your travels and this was a touching post. Go V!

  5. CJ says

    October 24, 2012 at 10:37 am

    Oh Chris! I’m just learning of this. Message me and let me know if I can help. Love to you and Mel.

  6. Kay says

    October 26, 2012 at 9:29 pm

    As always, Chris, you did your best with the light you had to see by at the time.

Trackbacks

  1. Anything That Moves You Forward - Vacilando says:
    July 14, 2014 at 12:36 am

    […] the last, this is the one to propel us forward. Past the difficult weeks we’ve had since Mel’s mom passed. Then… Engine problem #3 and lastly Hurricane Sandy. The one-two punch if you ask me. […]

  2. About A Butterfly Wing - Vacilando says:
    January 14, 2015 at 11:56 pm

    […] on October 21, 2012 I wrote a post called Not Much Happens And Everything Happens and it was the first post to be written after Melody’s mom Kathryn passed away. It was the […]

  3. Once Upon A Sailboat - Vacilando says:
    October 1, 2015 at 9:34 pm

    […] it leaves us raw and exposed at times, we become stronger in the end. There are times, such as losing my Mom, when I wouldn’t have been able to hold myself together without the strength acquired through […]

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ABOUT US

CHRIS: Singer/Songwriter and author from Philly, (and also the author of this blog), transplanted to Nashville, took a break from the music biz and somehow convinced his girlfriend (now wife) to live on a boat and began writing books. You can check out his music on iTunes or his books on Amazon.

MELODY: Thought her husband was crazy for wanting to live on a boat, but never one to shy away from an adventure, decided to play along and fell in love with cruising. She blogs about how to make money while cruising at Saving to Sail and helps solopreneurs build 6-figure digital product businesses at Soloprenista.

JET: Dutch Shepherd rescue who traveled more miles in his 14 years than most people do in a lifetime. Refuses to vacuum his own hair and instead insists on shrimp tails and belly rubs. (Update: Jet crossed the Rainbow Bridge on Sunday, May 23, 2021 but will always be our favorite crew member and is dearly missed.)

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